The Full Story: lived experiences - Grandparents
The below excerpts illustrate some experiences that estranged or alienated grandparents and grandchildren have gone through, their thoughts and feelings and the different ways bonds can be broken. Please note that images are not representations of these experiences and do not feature anybody mentioned.
"Our son met and married a girl...the marriage ended in a bitter divorce and our son started a new relationship with a much younger girl. We regularly helped with childcare several times a week for both grandchildren. However, his new partner took any well-meaning constructive advice we gave as criticism. Eventually....we had been substituted now as grandparents by her parents"
"A third grandchild was born.... we were only granted limited access. Shortly after, two serious false allegations were made against us for physical & verbal abuse. Our offers to talk, ‘letter write’, and even 3rd party mediation was rejected. We didn’t see the 3 grandchildren for over a year which was devastating. We reluctantly decided to go down the legal route but have never regretted it..... The Magistrates court granted a Contact Order as they rightly decided that it was in the best interests of the children. Our son..... has spent the last 10 years trying to frustrate the Contact Order, even though all 3 children had always enjoyed their limited, but happy times with us."
"False allegations of harassment and historic domestic abuse (without injury) were given to the police 5 years ago....led to an extremely aggressive and stressful police visit to our home who were considering making an “arrest and interview”. We made a formal complaint about the Police Officers involved....eventually conceded there was no evidence of harassment nor domestic abuse. We received a written apology, and an officer was disciplined. They assured us they would revise the procedure of any future handling of such accusations"
"Our son continued his campaign of ‘revenge’
against us, poisoning the minds of an elderly
relative, and recently the elder two grandchildren, who are in their late teens, with his false allegations. This has been done to alienate them from us completely. By exerting coercive control over them he tries to ensure they we have minimal to no contact with us in case they discover what is the reality".
"I grew up not knowing my grandparents. When I was 14, I turned up independently on my Nan's doorstep. She recognised me immediately, saying I was just like my mum. I had literally jumped on a train in the spur of the moment. I made sure I regularly saw my nan after that".
